At least you found somebody... Someone I knew once knew from the time she was an early teen that she never wanted kids. Her doctors (yes plural) all told her that until she hit 35 she couldn't get her tubes tied, because she'd change her mind someday. Well, "someday" she got raped, and couldn't afford the abortion until it was too late.
She gave the kid up for adoption.
STILL, any doctor she went to refused to do it until she hit 35. She'd already proven she didn't want to have/keep a kid, but they wouldn't let her get permanently sterilized.
For her 35th birthday, she got a tubal ligation.
Why is it that doctors think that the magic age is 35, and women can't seriously make up their minds before then?
Java, it's not always so easy to find a new doctor. With respect to having babies, few doctors are willing to risk that a woman won't change her mind later and sue them for causing her to have to go the test tube route. Some (like my previous example) will tell a woman flat out "she needs to have more babies", even if she's already had as many kids as she wants and wants to stop. But (and I realize you've never had this told to you, considering you'll never have to worry about getting pregnant), the vast majority of doctors out there will flat out tell you they won't do it before you're 35, because they're afraid you'll change your mind.
What truly irks me is they even tell this to women and/or couples that shouldn't be having babies in the first place, because of medical/physical/mental concerns.
I wouldn't object to this whole thing so much if they discussed it as "reproductive planning" rather than as a "pre-conception" thing. I wouldn't object so much if it weren't for the sheer number of doctors out there who WON'T allow a woman to no longer be "pre-conception". It's damned difficult to find a doctor who will agree to sterilizing a woman before she's mostly done with the "safe" reproductive years, and half of them won't do it unless your HUSBAND agrees. If you're single, forget it.
no subject
She gave the kid up for adoption.
STILL, any doctor she went to refused to do it until she hit 35. She'd already proven she didn't want to have/keep a kid, but they wouldn't let her get permanently sterilized.
For her 35th birthday, she got a tubal ligation.
Why is it that doctors think that the magic age is 35, and women can't seriously make up their minds before then?
Java, it's not always so easy to find a new doctor. With respect to having babies, few doctors are willing to risk that a woman won't change her mind later and sue them for causing her to have to go the test tube route. Some (like my previous example) will tell a woman flat out "she needs to have more babies", even if she's already had as many kids as she wants and wants to stop. But (and I realize you've never had this told to you, considering you'll never have to worry about getting pregnant), the vast majority of doctors out there will flat out tell you they won't do it before you're 35, because they're afraid you'll change your mind.
What truly irks me is they even tell this to women and/or couples that shouldn't be having babies in the first place, because of medical/physical/mental concerns.
I wouldn't object to this whole thing so much if they discussed it as "reproductive planning" rather than as a "pre-conception" thing. I wouldn't object so much if it weren't for the sheer number of doctors out there who WON'T allow a woman to no longer be "pre-conception". It's damned difficult to find a doctor who will agree to sterilizing a woman before she's mostly done with the "safe" reproductive years, and half of them won't do it unless your HUSBAND agrees. If you're single, forget it.
Yeah, we get shafted six ways from sunday.